During the intimate dance of coupling, we've stepped on each other's toes along the way. We've sustained small and maybe not-so-small hurts. We've had places we've not felt seen, acknowledged, or appreciated. We've felt unsafe or judged or not received. We've been in conflict. And while we humans are awfully resilient, these things have still likely resulted in us protecting, shielding, or tucking away our oh-so-tender heart.
This, a closed heart, is the breeding ground for the most common and painful difficulties in long-term partnership---we make our partner wrong, we see the ugly, we project way into the future (usually psyching ourselves out with repetitive thoughts that the relationship is flawed or that we're not right together), we can't feel the love, we reject them in small ways, we blame, we judge...and so on.
So before you go down that road, consider slowing down and contacting your heart. Life looks very different from a space of a blooming open heart, fully feeling. Whether the relationship survives or not, you deserve to be in contact with your own heart. And from that place, you can consider whether the relationship needs some repair or outside support so that you both can live in it with your hearts open.
Thanks for reading! Please leave me a comment and let me know how it feels when your heart is wide open.