Sitting here, my heart overflowing with appreciation and love, I'm reminded about just how crucial appreciation is in intimate partnership. Appreciation is a lubricant that keeps relationships juicy, alive, and running smoothly. Without it, they stagnate. More on that in a minute, but first, here's what's got me so turned on with appreciation. I woke up at my man's house this morning having completely forgotten that last night we left my car someplace else and took his. He left early for work and I jumped straight on an early-morning client call. At the start of the session, I remembered that I didn't have my car! "Shit, how'm I gonna get to my massage right after this?" I would have to wait until the session was over to call the massage therapist and cancel with only 15 minutes notice and I'd look like a total flake. And I'd miss my massage. And be stranded. Ugh. This logistical hell would screw my entire day.
An hour later, at the exact moment I ended my session, my man texted me saying that he left his car for me so I could take it. He also left me some cash for the tip since he knew I didn't have any on me and wouldn't have time to run by the bank. Oh, and did I mention that the massage itself was also a gift from him? And that he'd made me breakfast that morning?
When I realized that he'd solved this mess without needing anything from me, and that he'd given of himself so freely, my heart opened. WIDE. I felt SO supported, loved, and appreciated! And perhaps most importantly? I felt (and still feel!) super inspired to appreciate him, love him up, do something special for him. (And yes, I do have something in the works!)
A few hours later, when I was excitedly sharing my appreciation of him over the phone, he shared with me that he'd had a very challenging day and was in kind of a funk. But my sharing my appreciation of him perked him right up and lifted his mood. I could actually feel him feeling better! He felt appreciated and loved and he let me know it.
Sitting with this experience today, I'm aware of just how special this is. Our appreciation, support, and love felt so strong, potent, and nourishing to me! It just kept feeding on itself the more we felt it and shared it with each other. Which had me thinking about relationships that go stale, get stuck in a rut, or lose passion over time. God, do I know how that feels! You know, the ones that're just starving for that heart-opening, super-connected feeling? When relationships get good doses of appreciation like this on a regular basis, it's like a shot in the arm of good medicine.
And, appreciation breeds more appreciation. Share your appreciation generously, and your partner will likely give you more things to appreciate. Actively looking for ways to appreciate and love one another feels so good, AND it's great for the health of your relationship.
So, let's flex our appreciation muscles to create a more loving world! I'd love to hear your stories about sharing appreciation, so please leave a comment here. And if you need some help getting started, here's a great way to share some love:
"[Name], when you [fill in with something they did], I felt [fill in the impact]. Thank you."
It looks like this:
"Jason, when you noticed I didn't have a car and left yours for me, I felt so appreciated, supported, and loved. It has me super inspired to share more of my love with you and look for ways to do something nice for you. Thank you so much!"
Thanks for reading. I so appreciate it!